$20,000

i cracked an egg on my neighbors head because her brother convinced me to do it. then another day i got so mad at her brother and i screamed so loud to the point that i saw stars. then we made a parody of “chopped” and “man vs. wild” and thought we were gonna be famous if we uploaded them to youtube. we didn’t get famous, but i remember feeling like i could do anything when i was with them.

a few years ago i was laughing really hard, and then i chocked, and then my friend choked trying to save me from choking.

i used to say that no movie ever made me cry and then i saw “the theory of everything” (also side note have you SEEN Eddie Redmayne in a plaid suit??!)

one time my brother and i pretended to be those people who knock on peoples doors and tell people they won $20,000. so we got all dressed up and made a huge check and went knocking. somehow i thought people would believe they just hit the jackpot, but i guess two tweens thinking they ran the world wasn’t convincing enough.

i thought i was in love one time and i loved and i wasted and i laughed and i wasted and it totally destructed me.

my dad used to do ballet with me in the front yard. we used to dance together and i didn’t realize it at the time, but it was the moments with my dad when i realized what love felt like.

the love i felt when i thought i was in love wasn’t anything close to how i felt dancing with my dad, or how it felt to run from house to house with giant poster board with my brother. it wasn’t the same as climbing trees in the backyard and pretending to be Bear Grylls. that’s how i knew it was wrong. now i know what to look for. i always knew, i just got distracted.

*squirrel

,e